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Having my parents here renewed my awareness that even though I'm living in a pretty advanced city, I am definitely living in a different country and culture. I guess it's true that you get used to the ox/horse pulled carts in the road, 20 people crammed in the back of a tiny pickup truck, or guards with guns outside every place of business and at many residential complexes. Of course every once in a while I am reminded of that in other ways, too. Two nights ago my roommate Lennin and I shared a Macaroni and Cheese dinner. It was his first Mac 'n' Cheese ever! I was going to include a picture of us sharing this moment, but I couldn't find my camera (don't worry, I did find it the next day under some clothes). It wasn't more than a few months earlier that we shared a similar moment as he ate his first peanut butter and jelly sandwich. :) You might not guess it, but it's quite a joy to be sharing these things with someone who has never tasted them.

I wanted to ask for your prayers on a specific and very important thing. During the next month (or less) I will be deciding whether or not to return for a third year to teach English at NCA Nejapa. I have struggled with many aspects of teaching, and I realize that at least some of those are things that every new teacher struggles with, especially given a cross-cultural environment. However I have also been feeling that some struggles cannot necessarily been accredited to the difficult context in which I find myself, but rather are the result of my trying to be a teacher when in fact I'm better equipped for serving in another field. I have learned a ton by working in this capacity and wish I fit in a little better, but I keep getting the sense that my gift set lies elsewhere. I have spoken to the directors of the school and their responses were very gracious. They noted an appreciation for my two solid years (given that I finish this year) and recognized that the struggles that I have gone through could be good reason to leave. They also offered to support me should I feel the Lord leading me to continue teaching.

If I do decide to leave this position, I will be looking for different work. This is kind of a scary thought, since I'm not sure where I'd like to work or what I'd like to do. I am enjoying living in Nicaragua, and would like to continue. As I have said in previous emails, I am very satisfied with the friendships I have here, and really enjoy life in general outside of school. One opportunity that has come along here in Nicaragua would involve moving out of Managua and into a small town two hours northeast of here called Santa Lucia. My role in Santa Lucia would be somewhat unclear and undefined, generally having to do with community development. I would be shadowing a Nicaraguan man who pretty much trains local leaders in agriculture and leadership skills. I would be shadowing him for a while hopefully learning a lot and then looking for ways I could help and be involved in the development. This picture (from the previous post's slideshow) shows two women and a coffee-roaster. One part of my job would include working with this co-op and helping them to develop their business so that they could sell more coffee and generate more income. At first, this opporunity sounded great to me, but the excitement has been dwindling, and I'm not sure that I would enjoy it as much as I originally thought.

One interesting thing has been on my mind during the past week or so. A friend reminded me that often what we need for life decisions is not for God to give us a clear direction (i.e. handwriting on the wall or a personal email from God himself) but rather faith that in what we choose to do God will be present and working. That is to say, faith in his promise to bless his people as they go about his work in the world. Reminds me of a conversation I had with a certain Chad during my time in the Philippines. He was struggling through a decision of where to pursue higher education. For him, God was opening up different doors, allowing him to choose--God would be faithful in whatever Chad entered, in whatever calling he pursued. Maybe he does give us choices. Maybe it shouldn't be clear one way or the other. But one thing is clear, God always has been and will always be faithful.

It seems there is less than one week now until our midyear vacations are done. Next Monday we will resume the normal class schedule. I have enjoyed the vacation life and wish it could continue.

One more thing, almost forgot. Here's a photo of me with my new glasses. I'm not sure if I mentioned in my last post that a long-armed, skinny little monkey, lightning quick, took the previous pair right off my face from two feet away and through a chain linked fence. Had them back inside the cage and in a figure-eight before I could even blink. Beware of monkeys.



So it boils down to these prayer requests.

-prayer for guidance in my search for a decision about teaching.
-prayer for doors to open to desirable alternatives to teaching, and also for a faith to take life as it comes (and of course the strength and courage to go out and pursue it, too!)
-prayer for creativity, patience, and all that good stuff for the fast-approaching second semester.