lights and poverty

The countdown has begun: 13 days of classes remaining, six of which are really half days. During the last several weeks, I've been struggling more with one particular class. The behavior and attitudes in this class seem to be getting worse. For about the last 4 weeks I've been trying harder to get them to listen and follow my directions, and it seems to be a losing battle. When I demand obedience, they get frustrated and are even more rebellious. It's a difficult position, and I'm sure that if you're a parent you have experienced some of this with your own children. It's disappointing to me since we're so close to the end. Even so, I'm still hopeful that we can end on a good note. Hopefully I can still make a connection with the instigators and encourage them to make the right choices in class. At any rate, I think we're all ready for a vacation. :)

The power situation in Nicaragua has been worse lately. Power outages in the area where the school is have been consistently 5-6 hours every day. The schedule usually alternates each week. One week it will be out from 2pm-7pm, and the next week from 5-10. However, during this last week, we've had power consistently every day, all day. While most people come here and are startled by the frequent power outages, asking, "Why is there no power?" those of us who have lived here for a while are startled when there is power and we're now asking "Why is there power?" Power outages continue everywhere else as normal. Actually, and unfortunately, power at my house has now gone out for two Saturdays in a row. You may recall me mentioning that power rarely goes out in our neighborhood because of a women's hospital located on the same power grid. To add to the difficulty, today there is no water at the house either (even more necessary than electricity). Water shortages seem to be just as frequent as power outages in Managua.

Sometimes the gap between rich and poor and the general poverty in Nicaragua hits me harder than other times. The gap here is perhaps larger than the gap in the US. Or maybe it's just more clear because the physical distance is so much closer. Or maybe it's just more evident because of how much poverty there is. There are always people begging on the streets at intersections, even children begging well into the dark hours of the night. There's always the blind man feeling his way through the neighborhood asking for money at everyone's front door. There are children asking for even just one córdoba (about 6 cents) in the parking lot at PriceMart (the local expression of Costco). There's the wrinkled old woman outside of the La Colonia grocery store. It's never easy to know what to do, or how to respond. Most of the time I can be polite and friendly, but still be firm in my decision to not give. I tell myself that I don't want to encourage begging. Or I tell myself that I know there are guards or other adults nearby who have sent these children begging on their behalf, which can definately be true.

But sometimes I'm forced to ponder the issue more deeply. It's tough when I allow myself to enter their lives for a moment's time. Speaking with a few other teachers at the school, I was gripped again by the poverty around me. I asked them how have things been from their perspective since Daniel Ortega took office. Worse. Their answer was clear. Food prices have gone way up. I'm not especially tuned to the price of food. I do shop every few weeks, but I can't remember prices from one time to the next. Recently the prices of beans and rice (the main course...or only course...for most Nicaraguans) has sky-rocketed from 7 córdobas per pound to 24 córdobas. One teacher told me that he has to spend sometimes up to $12/day on food (for the two adults and two children). Doesn't sound too bad until you figure a salary of not much more than $300/month. And he has a decent job. Public school teachers make half or less. Add to food the other costs of living and working: transportation, electricity, phone, gas, clothes, etc., and soon you start to feel the weight of poverty. How do you make it work? How do you eat?

In discussing these thoughts with a friend last night, she mentioned a verse she'd been thinking about. I don't remember the reference, but it was an exhortation to those who have to share with those who have not. Not first to do a background check, or make sure they're going to use the money stewardly, or to make sure they're going to use the way we want them to, or to place other requirements or demands on them. Give. The message was simple. Share. The Lord has blessed some with the ability to give. Others are in real need. It's not an easy thing to do--share. It's much easier to let others do it. Especially here, for me.

Gotta run. I have a soccer game this afternoon. Hopefully we finally win!

AUTHOR'S UPDATE: Yes, we won! Our first win of the year. 3-0.

Prayer Items:

-Pray for a good end to the academic year. I really want to finish having fun with my students.
-Pray for the poverty in Nicaragua. Pray for the leadership...pray for good leadership that is focussed on the real needs of the people.
-Pray for a sense of compassion for those in need and a generous and thoughtful spirit in knowing how to share...for me and for you too! :)
-Pray for Christians here, that they would live faithful and Spirit-filled lives, and that they would be a part of the solution to the large problems of Nicaragua.

day of the dead

I thought I'd just post something quick. It's been a while, and I wanted to drop another line.

I'm looking forward to the end of the year, and it's coming quickly! We're about 3.5 weeks of classes and 1 week of exams from the finish line. Much to do between now and then, including wrap up and review materials, create exams for the end of the year, create reparation exams for the beginning of next year, and do some general planning for the future of the English department at Nejapa. I just sat down today for the first concentrated (well...more or less...) conversation with the other English teacher. We've been talking informally with each other and with the administration about next year, but decided that we'd make it a little more formal at least between us and get some things on paper. First, we did a SWOT analysis (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats) for the English department. We brainstormed further about what possibilities there could be for the future of the program. Most of the opportunities included more interaction and collaboration between different English classes such as organizing plays and performances, cultural expositions, a spelling bee, some kind of publication, radio/video productions, food presentations. It should be exciting to work towards these lofty goals during the following years, whoever takes the position. I think in the SWOT, the largest section was by far the opportunities.

My fourth graders made this a very difficult week for me. They have been misbehaving more and more, it seems. I recieved some encouragement from a parent today that gave me full support. I sent home a note yesterday with every students that explained that it had been a difficult week in terms of behavior, yesterday being the most difficult. I also explained that due to this difficulty, the students lost 15 minutes of lunch break (a very serious matter, I think, as lunch is important). By the end of class, students had earned 3 minutes of silience without recess (which, given what happened in class was very gracious). When they refused to quiet down, I told them their three minutes would begin when they started or end after they had wasted 15 minutes of their recess. During those fifteen minutes, they proceeded to makes jokes and do various things to get under my skin. I did my best to not show emotion, but what bothered me most was their disrespect and determination to not do what I expected of them. I expected to hear parents up in arms, but the one response I got today was one of full support along with an explanation of her own disappointment in several of the students in the class. I'll be having discussions this next week with the other teacher and the director, I hope, about what can be done. There are a few students who are strong influences and instigators, so maybe we can target our response. I found her encouraging mostly because over the past several days/weeks/months I've been wondering if I am the problem because I'm too strict or something, but what she said and the stories she told confirmed to me that I am up against some attitudes and behavior much more serious that I had previously thought.

I was looking foward to going on a trip with the Nehemiah Center to visit a community in northern Nicaragua on Wednesday. Unfortunately it was canceled and I'm not sure why. I'm still looking forward to starting my work there and starting a new routine. It will obvoiusly change my life a great deal. I do feel some sadness about not spending time with kids like I am now. The more I do it, the more I enjoy it. I still don't feel the love or confidence for the teaching part, but I think I'll miss the kids. The kindergartners are especially affectionate and moldable. Today we went through the CD we have been using with the book and I was amazed at points that they had picked up on words when I thought they hadn't figured them out.

I don't have any new pictures. Sorry. Still without a camera, and missing it more at certain times than others. Today we had a sort of fair at the school. It's a cross between a fundraiser and a celebration. It is the Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead), which is a rite of the catholic church. Every cemetery was full of people. They came and cleaned up the grave sites, left flowers, and whatever else they do...I'm not sure. Very busy places they are on this day. I wish I had a picture of all of the flowers for sale and the congestion around the entrance of the cemetery near the school.

One more interesting note. I've been very interested lately in a new operating system that I've discovered. For those who don't know, Microsoft Windows or Mac OS are both operating systems. Anyway, the new operating system is called Ubuntu. It's a relatively new distribution of linux. Previously I've found Linux a difficult operating system to use. Installing it, installing programs, updating things...a big headache. Well, with Ubuntu, all of that is made extremely easy. In many ways it is much better than Windows, and i almost prefer it to Mac OSX, which says an awful lot. Best part is that it's free. It also comes with a free version of Microsoft Office called OpenOffice. It's compatible with all major office suites and contains a word processor, spreadsheet program, presentation program, and database program. Ubuntu also comes with a free version of Photoshop called the Gimp. If you have some time, go to Ubuntu's website, download the the file, follow the instructions for burning it to a CD, restart your computer with the CD in the CDROM. Your computer should automatically boot from the CD and you can try the the operating system without actually installing it (just don't run the icon on the desktop called "install")! It will load the operating system right from the CD. I am convinced that this operating system and the entire open source movement will become a huge thing in the coming years and offer a serious threat to Microsoft and Mac's operating systems. While it takes full advantage when run on a new computer, it's also runs better than Window and Mac OS on older computers--so if you're upgrading, you could give it a try on the old computer while you're getting used to it.

That's about it for now. Thank you for your continued prayers and support! Have a great weekend!

coolness

Good Saturday evening to everyone. At least, that's how it is for me. The weather here is quite unusual. This may not sound strange to you, but I'm sitting here in jeans and a t-shirt, with no fan, and wondering if I should put on my sweatshirt and some socks. I wouldn't say it's cold, but it's certainly close to it. I just checked the temperature on AccuWeather.com and they say it's 79°F. I've made jokes about it before...about how anytime it get under 80, we start to think it's cold...and under 70 is down right freezing. There is some truth to that, especially when it's raining and we haven't seen the sun much. And it's been raining for the past week solid. Starting to feel like Michigan with all of the gray days we've been having. I like it, really. It reminds me of fall.

I've had a few people request a photo of my motorcycle. Unfortunately I lost my camera about the same time I got my motorcycle, so it's been a little less convenient to ask others to take pictures and then get the pictures from them. Below are a few pictures taken last weekend (before the rain started) of my bike, along with 5 others. One missionary, who's been here for 9 years led us out to a community he's been working along side since he arrived. We took the bikes down some paved roads and also did some off-roading. It was good for me to get more practice and I really enjoyed both seeing the community and the ride itself.

In this photo, we are sitting outside a small roadside store along the way. Stopped for a few cold drinks after riding for an hour or more. The roads at this intersection are nicely paved but we were going through mud only minutes before.



Here we're fixing a couple of things. My bike and Luke's bike (we bought them together) both have faulty battery boxes which are breaking off at the mount point. His fell off completely first, and his battery was hanging by the wires. When we stopped to try to figure out what to do I also checked mine only to find it was about to break.



In this photo, we're looking at a business that was started maybe 8 years ago in the area where the missionary has been working. They cut some kind of stone out of the ground. probably sandstone. some.



This picture was taken on the ocean just outside Transito, the community we visited. I'm with Luke.



Pressing on with teaching. Some days are good, and other days are very challenging. Nothing new in that regard. :) A few weeks ago the parents of one of the primary grades launched a list of complaints aimed at almost every class, including English. Actually, a separate list for each class. Among the complaints against the English program were that the only students who received good grades were those who either came from a bilingual background or took English lessons outside of classes at Nejapa. As the strongest complaint, it angered me and disappointed me when I heard it. I know it's not entirely true, first of all, and secondly, if it is partly true, it's at least due in large part to the attitudes of the students. For a long time, the students in this class were among my most difficult, and while they have grown they continue to be a difficult class. I had the opportunity to write a response, and I tried to put some of the responsibility back on the students for their own learning. Anyway, I'm not exactly sure if the parents have received the response, or how they will receive it (I think the director will be moderating/speaking on my behalf).

In other ways I have felt successful as a teacher and as a mentor of sorts. My youngest students are kindergarteners, and I have learned/am learning a lot about little people. It's definitely a big challenge and I always wonder if it's normal to have to deal with the same behavioral issues day in and day out. I seem to generally hear confirmation that it's not uncommon. Small steps, I guess, are important at young ages.

With 3 of my classes, we have finished the material in the curriculum, so we'll be moving on to next year's books (photocopied). This is pretty good considering that last year we were finishing much closer to the end.

Informal discussions have been happening between the principals directors and teachers about really bolstering the English program at Nejapa. Parents have made it clear that it is something very important for them. We'll be looking at hiring a replacement for me, as well as another 2 new teachers, effectively doubling the EFL staff. If you know anyone who is a skilled teacher and loves both the Lord and English (English in an appropriate, subordinate sort of love to the love for the Lord), please tell them about the need we have. Unfortunately I am not a good fit for the role, but it truly is an amazing opportunity in so many ways--personally, professionally, and spiritually.

I received an email several weeks ago, now, that kind of outlines my new job starting at the end of this year. I thought it would be interesting, so here is the list:

1) provide administrative and technical support to the Nehemiah media center
2) Provide technical assistance to the coordinator of planning, monitoring and evaluation (Luz)
3) Assist CRWRC in planning, monitoring and evaluation of special grants
4) Information technology support for the Nehemiah Center
5) Provide small business consulting to ACJ

If you had forgotten, ACJ (Asociación de Cristianos Jovenes) is the YMCA of Nicaragua. Number five refers to the work I'll be doing in Santa Lucia with the women's co-op. The folks at the Nehemiah Center have asked me to do a week of orientation before I leave for the states this December. This basically means that teaching will end on Friday (Nov. 30) and I'll start the following Monday (Dec. 3). One day of in-office orientation, three days going to a community on the Carribean coast of Nicaragua, and then one more day back at the office will leave me with just enough time to gather my things and run to the airport on that next Saturday (Dec. 8) to catch a plane heading to the US. I am really looking forward to this new position. It will be entirely different having much less structure and working with adults. A couple of the people I know there (the fellow CRCers) have told me that they're really looking forward to working with me and getting to know me better as a colleague and friend. It's encouraging to hear this, and there are many reasons I'm looking forward to joining them as well.

Thanks for your continued prayer, financial, and other support. All are greatly appreciated. Here is a list of some important prayer requests:

- prayer for strength to continue this year strong. I definitely feel the temptation to have an attitude of "just finish" but I want to finish feeling good about what we've accomplished up until the end.
- prayer for wisdom and humility for the schools leaders as they face both challenges and growth.
- prayer that I am able to balance the important areas of my life: rest, work, play, devotion, misc. :)

hello, moto

A few recent developments that I wanted to share with you all. One has to do with next year and one has to do with this afternoon.

First, about next year. I finally met with a few people from the Nehemiah center to discuss more formally what sort of role I could play in the upcoming year. Coming away from the meeting with a better idea, I thought, prayed and talked to a few people about the decision and a few days a go I accepted the job, which is pretty exciting. It will be a combination of Santa Lucia and Nehemiah Center. I'll spend the first month in SL, working on my Spanish and cultural understanding as well as building relationships there. When I'm at the NC I'll be working in the "Media Center" where they're going to have a recording studio and put together videos and audio. The center will be built this November, and unfortunately my involvement at it's beginning will be limited as Nejapa is obviously my #1 commitment through the end of the year. The center will house a semester course from Trinity College in Chicago and also be used as a tool to gather and express the stories of hope coming out of Nicaragua. The way I understand it, I'll be coordinating the use of the Center, maybe helping people know how to use the equipment and also maintaining the equipment. Everything is a little bit unclear but will come together as things develop and move forward. I'll be quite involved in whatever happens there. I'll probably be involved in some other technical aspects of the NC. What's more, there are always seminars happening there for community leaders, business leaders, church leaders, etc.. so I'll be able to sit in on those. And the other CRC people plan to include me in what they're doing so I can get a broader experience and hopefully during all of this figure out some things about where my gifts and interests lay. I'm excited to start! One logistical change for me is that I will need to be raising my entire income. The Nehemiah Center doesn't raise any money as an organization, and I will (proposedly) be joining the ranks as a "volunteer" through CRC World Missions.

Second, about this afternoon. Well, it actually started a while back. I've been thinking for a while about getting a motorcycle...which finally saw fruitition this afternoon! I would never have come to this point myself if I didn't have friends doing the same, but I think it will be convenient, economical, and fun. I figure I will be able to save more than 50% on fuel expenses, which I count on lowering my cost of living. Also, 2 of my friends are purchasing bikes and we plan to do a little riding together. I know--I know. It's pretty dangerous out there, so I'll be driving carefully. There's been some jokes about a missionary biker's club. In general, they're becoming much more common down here, and I expect the biking community among Americans to also grow.

I've been feeling less stress with teaching lately, and am enjoying more and more the relationships with students. It's a challenge to work with them and teach them--it involves so much more than English. I've learned a great deal and am quite glad I took this job and stuck with it two years. I know the Lord has really taken this opportunity to mold me and shape me. I pray that as I serve him in the future at the Nehemiah Center, he will continue to do the same. We certainly serve a faithful God.

Gotta run. Thanks for your thoughts and prayers! The Lord has been answering them! Let me know how you're doing sometime.

As far as the...

upcoming year goes, I have pretty much made the decision not to return to teaching. I have spoken with both the principal at my school and the director. Both were understanding and supportive of me in the decision. It was definitely not an easy decision to come to. I will have to turn in the co-worker status with many good friends at the school, I will also be leaving many students that I have grown to love. The Lord is doing a great work in and through NCA Nejapa, and I am excited for the next teacher to be jumping into my shoes.

I wanted to share with you another potential opportunity, which is to work at/with the Nehemiah Center. I know several people who work there now. It's a very cool organization that is actually a smattering of many organizations working together to train and empower Nicaraguans as community leaders, pastors, business people, etc. Teaching a biblical worldview is foundational in their work. It's an organization that is growing rapidly and making a great impact. I'd likely be filling some kind of projects-based job, helping various organizations complete projects as they need help. It would give me a lot of exposure to various areas of development and types of work. I'm going to hopefully be talking with the director in a few weeks to basically hear about how they need help. I've already spoken informally with a few people who work there now. One brought up the idea of working both with the Nehemiah Center and in Santa Lucia (see the last article). I'm not sure what that would look like, but that's what the upcoming meeting will develop.

A couple of things that excite me about the possibility of working there. First, it allows me to stay in close proximity to the friends I've made at Nejapa (and at NCA), and possibly stay involved with some of the students whose lives I've grown a part of (through tutoring or big-brother type thing). Second, because I wouldn't leave Managua, I could continue living where I live and being a part of things that I've been a part of outside of school.

There have been a few other people with other suggestions, as well. For sure there are a lot of opportunities and needs here in Managua. But I'm going to need to feel the Lord pulling me one way or another in order to make any decisions about next year.

In other news, my hard drive failed this last weekend! And me without a backup external hard drive. Nuts! Fortunately I had saved a lot of my school files to a flash drive and much of my music to a friend's computer. But I still lost a great deal of information including photos and videos from the last couple years. I hope I can get someone to recover that information. Good thing is that I have an extended warranty to replace the bad hard drive at no cost.

If you know anyone who would make a great ESL teacher here at Nejapa, I would love for you to put me in touch with them. I want to see a good person take my place because it really is a great opportunity to be invovled with what God is doing here in Nicaragua.

Have a good one! Caio.

Prayer Items

- continued prayer for faith as I approach a major decision
- data recovery. :)
- an excited and capable and ready new teacher